What happens in the Thousand Needles…

January 20, 2009

This is a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure style story. Grab a coin to flip, and read the first paragraph, making your choice and following the instructions at the end of the paragraph to your next part of the story where you will make another choice and continue on. Enjoy!



You step, blinking, into the sunlight from the shade of the massive mesa above you, wondering what to do. In just the last hour you went from the beloved child of Bloodhoof Village to an orphan, stranded in the Thousand Needles.

Reliving the incident, you recall how happy everyone was as they were walking to Freewind Post on holiday. Singing, joking, the small band was completely unprepared for the centaur attack when it happened. One of the hunters had pushed you off the road into a bush and gone to fight, and when you got back to the road, everyone you knew had died, laid out in the harsh Needles sun and the centaur run away with your food. Well, you won’t last long out here without the supplies, so do you…
Choose to take the road East? Go to 5.
West? Go to 3.


You continue along your path to the North, each step carrying you farther uphill.
Go to 16.


The road stretches before you to the west, hot and dusty. Vultures circle overhead, a short distance off the road, and the oppressive heat makes the air before you shimmer. Suddenly, a crack splits the air! You near leap out of your skin only to realize it was a frightened rabbit crossing your path, the stick it must have broken laying in pieces behind it. You sigh and make to continue on when you notice a game trail off the road that the rabbit came from. Do you…
Stick to the road, it has to lead somewhere, right? Go to 28.
Take the game trail, maybe it’ll take you someplace cooler… Go to 13.


The passage leads you around in what feels like a big arc, though if you’re going up or down you couldn’t say. Suddenly you feel a passage open up on the left. Do you…
Take the passage on the left, just for a change? Go to 35.
Stick to the arc around to the right? Go to 37.


The East road seems welcoming…sort of. At least there’s the shade of the mesa above you for a while until you move past it and feel the furnace blast down on you again. Pausing in the shade of a boulder for a moment you notice a small game-track leading off the road to one side. Do you…

Stick to the road, maybe you’ll find another mesa for shade. Go to 17.
Take the game trail, maybe all the wildlife has a secret ice-cream stand hidden away in the bush! Go to 13.


It’s dark. In fact it’s so dark you keep seeing stray lights in your field of vision as your head tries to compensate. And if dark wasn’t enough, it’s cold and damp. And you just stepped in something that could have been guano…if you could see. Preoccupied with such mournful thoughts, you don’t notice the next fork in the road until you slam into the divider between the right and left passages. Do you…
Go left again, to keep the pattern? Go to 22.
Go right to break it up? Go to 50.


North it is! North, North…reminds you of Northrend. Snow, ice, water…if only you could have a bit of that now!
You stumble off in the heat to 16.


Trying not to look down too much, you shimmy down the rope as the world sways and narrows to the spot directly in front of you. Risking a glance up, you wish you hadn’t as you witness a section of rope above you begin to unravel! Working far more quickly now you continue down and down until you hear a sickening “Snap!” above you and fall…About half a foot, then land on your rump. Phew!
Shimmy on down to 41.


You suddenly find yourself in a wide cavern with a luminescent pool on the other side, creating just enough light for you to see by. Inspecting the pool you see the continuation of your tunnel off in the distance across the pool and a second tunnel that leads off below the surface of the water. Do you swim…
Down. I wonder where it goes? Go to 26.
Across, you don’t know how long you’d have to hold your breath for! Go to 30.


You continue on to the south, approaching another of those big mesas. Taking a break you sit down on a rock only to leap up again when you notice a rattlesnake next to you on the ground! Except it isn’t a snake, it’s just a bit of coiled rope. Relieved you…
Add a length of rope to your inventory and head to 15.


Whaddya mean you’re giving up that easily? Ya yellow-bellied coward, can’t even find the courage to open a chest and you expect to make it to civilization in a harsh environment like this? Sheesh.
Try again in 13.


Climbing down onto the ledge you walk along until a rumbling noise comes from overhead, rockslide! You make a wild leap to save your life!
Flip a coin. If it lands…
Heads. Go to 24.
Tails. Go to 48.


The game trail continues on to a large box, half buried in the dirt. Moving closer you see that it’s a rough chest, and locked. Do you…

Ignore it and continue? Go to 11.
Try to open it? Flip a coin. If it lands…
Heads. Go to 19.
Tails. Go to 29.


Resisted. Damn!
The grimtotem brave picks you up and slings you over his shoulder, carrying you off up a staircase that winds up a mesa.
Go to 46.


You travel on South in the general direction of a large Mesa, Hoping it will turn out to be Freewind Post.
Go to 61.


You move North climbing farther uphill until it planes out into a flat expanse before you. Then you realize what you’re looking at is not a horizon line, but the line of a cliff’s edge.
Go to 18.


Your easterly track dead ends into another road heading North-South. Do you…
Head North? Go to 2.
Head South? Go to 10.


You peek over the cliff edge and look down. A long way down. There is, however, a ledge that runs along the cliff face just below you, and slopes down. You could probably take the ledge as a kind of path to get to the bottom. There is also a somewhat large bit of rock projecting over the edge of the cliff. If you had a rope, you could probably climb down on that. There seems to be a dark blob just below you, but you ignore that and decide…
If you have picked up a rope along the way, you can climb down (Or rather, back up…) to 8.
If you decide to try the ledge, go to 12.


Tauren can’t be rogues! You can’t open the box and now you’re off the road. Do you…
Go North? Go to 24.
Go South? Go to 32.


You bellow a great battle cry and charge, head down, into the stomach of the poor Grimtotem scout. He lays wheezing on the ground behind you as you realize you have no weapons and run for it!
Scamper off to 56!


As you step on the glyph, the writing flashes bright green beneath you. You get the sudden feeling of an invisible foot punting you from behind as you fly up and up into the air! Just then your momentum breaks and you start falling. The sky goes black and you find yourself hanging in nothingness, stomach getting more and more upset as you loose track of up and down. After what could either be less than the length of a heartbeat or an eternity later, shapes slide into being on all sides, and you find yourself standing on solid ground again. Not the most pleasant transportation spell you’ve ever been privy to but at least you’re alive!
Stagger back up to 9.


The tunnel ends in a wall of intense white light…or maybe it’s just medium light and you’re too blinded to know the difference. Before you is a cliff stretching rather far on either side. You could go back into the tunnel, but somehow you’ve gotten to appreciate your vision more that you ever did before.
Continue on to 18.


You walk off to the South with the sun beating mercilessly down on your head. Off down the road you see a mirage of Earth Song Falls in Mauradon and run toward it. As expected, the lush and vibrant water scene fades away as you get closer and you grumble as you continue on.
Go to 15.


You head off in a general Northerly direction, finding yourself climbing uphill as you continue.
Go to 16.


You attempt a fearsome battle cry only to have your voice crack. Embarrassed, you run up to the Grimtotem and attempt to pummel him into submission, but the heat of the long day has caught up to you, and your fighting style looks more like that of the female lead in a 50’s horror flick. The Grimtotem simply scoops you up and carries you off up a path to the top of a mesa.
Get carried away to 46.


You dive down into the water and make for the tunnel in the lake. As you reach the mouth of the tunnel your lungs begin to burn. You hope it’s not a very long swim to the other side. The tunnel starts out somewhat large, narrowing as it continues. Panic sets in as the tunnel closes around you and your air is about to run out! Just before you loose your mind from panic, the tunnel opens back out and you breach the surface, gasping like…well, like someone who just nearly drowned!
Go to 34.


The tunnel continues on for a good 20 yards before coming abruptly to another fork. Do you…
Go left again? Go to 6.
Or go right? Go to 57.


You continue on down the road only to find your self doing a face-plant in the dust. Enraged, you turn to smite whatever tripped you and see a rope stretched across the road. You coil the rope and take it with you, thinking that maybe you’ll find whoever put it there and trip [i]them[/i] in return!
Add a length of rope to your inventory and head to 33.


You think to yourself “Maybe when I get out of here I should go to Orgrimmar and ask to be the first Tauren rogue…” as you pop the lock on the box with a handy stick and open it gleefully. Confused you pull out the length of rope that the box was protecting. That’s it? Ah well, you throw the coil over your shoulder and look around. Off the road now you can either…
Add a coil of rope to your inventory and head North. Go to 24.
Or add a coil of rope to your inventory and march South. Go to 32.


Diving into the pool, you realize that the luminescence is caused by billions of tiny water elementals. Both fascinated and creeped out, you swim across the pool as quickly as possible and climb out the other side, heading down the tunnel.
Head on to 36.


Azuregos turns to look at you calmly and blinks his giant blue eyes at you. Suddenly the world turns black and white and you look down at your feet to see your physical body. Looking away from your own corpse, you gaze back up at Azuregos who says calmly, “Such is the price of Curiosity.” And walks away.



You head in a southerly direction, swatting at a cloud of flies that decided you look tasty.
Go to 15.


You continue on until you come to a fork in the road. One path heads North and has a tumbleweed in the middle of it while the other looks to go South and has nothing but a few outcroppings of rock. There is a large wooden beam that looks like it use to be a signpost between then but has since been cut in half, and a second marker planted below it in an incomprehensible language. You stare moodily down on the strange runes and letters while the sun climbs higher in the sky. About the point you’re sure your brain must be cooking in your skull from the heat you continue on your way. Do you…
Walk North? Go to 7.
Walk South? Go to 23.


Blinking, you step out into the sun as the tunnel suddenly ends and dumps you back out into the dusty day. Looking up at the sky you see the sun is near to setting, and nearby you hear the trickle of a stream. Do you…
Risk getting caught in the dark for a drink? Drink up 43.
Or hurry on your way? Rush to 39.


You continue down the left tunnel to the sound of an ominous rumbling.
Creep on to 42.


Stepping into the light you marvel that it hadn’t taken you longer in the tunnels to get out, given that you couldn’t see. Before you two rough tracks stretch East and West.
Go East? 49.
Go West? 47.


Feeling your way through the darkness, you come to another branching, this one opening on the right.
Follow the main tunnel to the left? Go to 60.
Take the offshoot? Go to 59.


You’re falling! And falling…and, eh…falling. You get the feeling that someone is playing a Bugs Bunny prank on you. Just before you hit bottom (or maybe hours from it, you can’t tell in these slow-mo dramatic sequences…) your Alterac Valley pops. Hitting the button to accept the summon, you forget all about silly Rp quests and return to grinding honor. Bah, it was probably gray anyway.



Moving away from the cave-mouth you realize how lucky you are when you find a road just beyond a clump of scrub-bushes.
Travel East? 49.
Head West? 47.


You roar with beastial vigor and charge into the goblins! Warstomping, you cast about for your first target…to see the goblins have fled! In the distance you see something that resembles a great elevator!
Hurry toward 65!


You get up and dust off then turn around and realize what the dark blot below you was. Before you an intimidating Grimtotem scout glares down. He’s remarkably tall, even for a tauren, and looks wiry with muscle. There seems to be something wrong with his eyes though…some deadness there… Ah well. Do you…
Stand your ground and fight! Scroll to 54.
Or feign death and hope he goes away! Collapse on 14.


The ominous rumbling grows ever louder until the walls around you begin to shake. Boulders start to fall from the ceiling and you’re buried before you can move anywhere. Maybe you’ll be close to town when you spirit-rez?



You’re soooo thirsty, you just have to get a drink! Pushing through the scrub, you’re almost to the water when you hear a deep bellowing from somewhere before you.
Do you run away? 39.
Or do you investigate the sound? 64.


Before you stands a blue dragon of massive proportions. Not just one of the giant drakes, but a full blue-aspect DRAGON. He’s probably big enough to build a village on. You don’t really know why Azuregos decided to land in the ‘Needles…or possibly how that cave system got you all the way to Azshara…but he’s there before you now!
Do you approach Azuregos and ask him why he’s there or which way civilization is? Go to 31.
Or do you flee for your life! Run to 47!


Who knows where that kodo came from! It’s much safer to stick to your own two hooves.
Walk on to 39.


At the top of the mesa the Grimtotem deposits you in a heap on the ground before…a human? Yes! A human clad in what appears to be a hodgepodge of gear…Devout skirt and Magister’s robes, Collar of Valor, even the druid leafy antler-shoulders! The human, in the meantime, walks up to the Grimtotem and slaps him on the shoulder.
“You imbecile!” Cries the human, “This is a tauren, not a taupe watermelon! My experiment requires that melon and you will get it for me!”
Sighing, the human gestures to a set of dire green markings on the ground. “Just throw it over there with the others and go find my melon. I knew I should have mind controlled a hyena instead but noooooo! I needed a pair of hands!”
He continues muttering in this vein for the entire duration of you being grabbed again and deposited unceremoniously on the glyph.
Go to 21.


You move west on the little track, hoping to find some sign of civilization. Somewhere ahead of you think you hear the sounds of voices. It could be the wind, but some internal sense tells you that something is there.
See whats there in 51.


Wild leaps are rather well knows for being, well, wild! You succeed in getting some momentum, but really it just pushes you out from the side of the cliff. Is there anything you can do?
Go to 38.


You walk off to the east with the sun once again beating down on you. In nearly no time the chill from the caverns is replaced by a strained, sweaty, exhaustion from the heat. Looking up, you start when you see something large and ice-blue in front of you. It’s not wavering like a mirage, and whatever it is-is entirely blocking the path.
Now what? See in 44.


You take a right turn and are encouraged by what seems to be a bit of light ahead!
Go toward the light! Wait, isn’t that bad? Eh, details! Go to 9.


You burst out of the bushes and freeze. All around you are dozens of goblins, all of them wearing the Venture Co. logo and busily mining away at some crystals embedded in the side of a mesa. Or they were until they saw you. The goblins all smile at each other, then turn back to you and begin advancing toward you…
Flip a coin. If it lands…
Heads. Go to 53.
Tails. Go to 40.


You find you can’t make much of a leap when there’s nothing beneath your feet to push off from! You’re falling now, and manage to dissociate yourself by the time you hit bottom. The world blackens, and you pop back into existence as a ghost. Mrs. Spirit Healer lady? Its so nice to see you again…



The goblins move very quickly. You put up a token resistance, but somehow half of them have circled around you already. Thankfully, the blunt end of a pick axe knocks you out before you see (or feel!) what else they do to you. Checking your map, you see the spirit healer is located on a major road by town. Oh well, it could have gone worse.



Threatening the Grimtotem scout with the Wrath of Doom and calling him the son of a motherless ogre, you prepare to do combat!
Flip a coin. If it lands…
Heads. Go to 20.
Tails. Go to 25.


You turn to follow the tunnel to the right, only to slam into the wall by overcompensating! Shuddering a bit, you put your hands to the walls figuring it’s better to be slimed than bruised and bleeding. Continuing on in this fashion, you start to panic as the walls start to edge apart. Pausing at the point the passage becomes too wide for your arms, you grope around and figure your tunnel just split into three. Hoping you still remember which direction you came from you choose to…
Take a left? Go to 60.
Move through the center? Feel your way to 62.
Continue down the right? 59.


In fleeing battle, you somehow make it back onto a major road. Just ahead of you can see a great elevator, civilization at last!
Civilization! Go to 65.


You take a right and walk on to the sound of an ominous rumbling…
Creep on to 42.


Easy now… It’s alright, I’m a friend…Easy girl… You soothe the kodo as you step around to the side. Patting her leathery side you raise one foot to a stirrup, and then mount all in one fluid motion. You take a moment to settle yourself into the saddle and congratulate yourself, but the moment is interrupted when the kodo near rears beneath you and charges off down some semblance of a track. Bouncing madly and hanging on to the saddle in a death grip, you don’t look up until the kodo slows, stops, and begins munching contentedly on a withered clump of weeds. When you do look up, you nearly cry with relief at the sight of a giant elevator.
Go to 65.


This right turn looks like every right-turn before it. Or rather it doesn’t have any look to it in the pitch-black. And that’s the problem. At least the tunnel doesn’t seem inclined to fork anymore…
Go to 63.


You walk along in the dark, stubbing your hooves and banging your horns on things that don’t even seem to exist anymore when you feel for them. Your hands are now rather well covered in slime, and the chill has settled itself deep into your bones.
Trip into 27.


Well, it isn’t Freewind Post, but it certainly looks cooler than standing out in the sun. Before you is the black entrance to a cave. Stepping inside, you walk on for some distance and realize you probably should have tried to make a torch before entering the cave because it is pitch dark in here. This realization, of course, coming just before you run into a wall. On either side of you the cave opens out into twin passages. Do you…
Take the left tunnel? Go to 27.
Head down the right? Go to 4.


You take the center tunnel and walk on. You think there may be a bit of rise in the ground, but it could be your imagination. As you walk on, you notice you can make out the rough outlines of the walls, and are beginning to avoid some of the obstacles. There’s light ahead!
Hurry to 9.


The tunnel begins to slope up and up. At a certain point, you find yourself able to see again, and rush gratefully to the cave exit before you.
Go to 34.


Creeping stealthily toward the sound, you see an extremely large (and purple?!) kodo step toward the stream and begin drinking. Surely mounting up would be a faster way to get to town, and would save your own hooves a bit of trouble? But then, you don’t know where this kodo came from, why it’s purple, or why it’s got a saddle and bridle on already! Do you…
Mount up and ride off into the sunset? 58.
Or ignore the kodo and keep on walking? 45.


Finally! You made it! You take the elevator up into Freewind Post, where you are promptly received with concerned looks and comforting embraces. After reporting the incident to the town authorities (Who run off to punish the centaur), you are given food and drink, and a pallet in the Inn. It won’t make up for what the centaur did, but it’s enough for now. You fall asleep knowing you’ll make it to the next adventure.



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